Jul 4

Fuck Anxiety

Woah what a whirlwind week. In typical Sammi Style I failed again. Was given a great opportunity, worked so hard pushed my mind and body to the max, ended up with a cold a bladder infection and a complete brain blow out and gave up.  

I don’t know if anyone reads this and I can’t say I really care but right now I’m feeling like a balloon that has been popped. Deflated, sad and just plain angry.

Found this quote today and it says it all really.

Oh well onwards and upwards I guess.

May 7

South East Asia Week Two

Day 11

As I had left the tour I would miss out on seeing the White Temple so I decided to book my own tour so that I could still see it. I woke up at six had some breakfast and got picked up by mini van at seven. There were 13 other people from varrying nationalities and we set off to Chaing Rai. I am so glad that I decided to go as the White Temple was absolutely magic, crazy but magic. The architecture was out of this world. Creepy pools of hands, hanging heads and intricate carvings adorned the white temple and I got some amazing photos. Definately a place to visit. Our next stop was to the long necked tribe. It was both interesting and heartbreaking. From the age of three girls wear the rings one for each year of their life. On their birthday the rings are removed and an extra one is added. We tried a necklace that was just the front half and it was so heavy I can only imagine what these girls go through day by day. Traditonally the women of the tribe would harvest and make opium but nowadays they have been taught to weave and make scarfs.

We stopped off for a buffet lunch which was delicious and was my first decent meal since the delhi belly. I was feeling so much better by this point.

After lunch we walked to the northern tip of Thailand and walked through to Myrama I was really excited to set foot in my 23rd country.

We then travelled to the golden triangle and boarded a long boat to an island in no mans land it was a little scary with monkeys tied to trees and and children begging but overall was a good experience.

Day 12

Today I would be meeting up with the tour group but not untill 4 so I decided to have a total pamper day. Pedicure, reflexology foot massage and time by the pool. Exactly what I needed.  I took a taxi to the next hotel and we all went out for the most delicious burger I have ever had. Beef with mac and cheese in a sweet potato bun. Yummmooooo.

Day 13

The tour group all went on a day hike which I said haha but no to so spent another day cafe hopping, had gel nails applied and spoke with all my loved ones. We then took an overnight bus to Bangkok I was so lucky and got a reclining seat so slept most of the night.

Day 14

Arriving in Bangkok in the early hours of the morning we were lucky enough to check into hotel. I had a beautiful shower and drunk lots of water and was ready to hit the grand palace. We had an epic local guide and took some great photos. It was so hot though and by the end of the tour we were sweaty messes. The arvo was relaxing meeting the new group members and chilling out.
We headed out to dinner and then went to Kho San Road a famous back packer street. Everyone ordered buckets and got absolutely trashed. Three girls had to go home and their was a brawl that one of our group members got caught up in. The rest of us headed to a night club and danced until 4 am we ended the night with maccas and slept well.

Until next time xxx

Apr 18

South East Asia week one

Wow what a week it has been!!!!
I started my journey early Friday morning saying goodbye to my Christopher was one of the hardest things I think I have done. My heart was breaking my anxiety was in full swing but I knew that this was an adventure I had to take on. The flight was pretty good a quick stop over in Sydney and then I was Bangkok bound. The flight was excellent free seats beside me and no turbulence. I arrived in Bangkok friday arvo and got in a taxi to my hotel. Close to Ko shan road I walked a k or two admirring the culture and craziness of Asia after having a meal on the street and stocking up with water I peacefully fell asleep after checking in with my loved ones at home.

Day two

I discovered that the hotel had a roof top pool so I swam and sunbathed before booking a taxi to the airport to take my flight to Hanoi.
Good Morning Vietnam. Wow what a beautiful country. I was mesmorised as I took the pre organised shuttle to the hotel. Five people on one bike, cows on the road, ladies with traditional hats working the rice paddies. Amazing.
I checked in to the beautiful hotel and had a meal at a nearby restaurant. I was both excited and nervous to meet up with my tour the next day so slept early and woke up around 5.30am

Day 3

I walked into the lobby and there was a crowd of foriengers that had just arrived. I heard someone mention Tucan Tours so I asked if this was my tour group. Sure enough it was. I choose to do the South East Asain Loop which is a continuous loop either starting in Bangkok or Hanoi. Some of these people were staying and some were on the last leg.

I asked what the plans were for the day and two ladies asked me to join them exploring the town. We had breakfast and set off to the Ho Chi Min Museum. It was quite a bore to be honest but the girls were lovely and we had a great time eating and drinking the day away. After lunch we made our way back to the hotel and met two others that were joining the tour we all talked about how excited and nervous we were and walked around the beautiful lake.
At 6.30 we had a pre departure meeting and a welcome dinner at a rooftop restaurant the sites were amazing and we decided to end our night on beer street. The street named after the fact that the locals brew their own beer and sell it to customers who sit on the street and get merry. We also had a sheisha pipe that relaxed us all and it was a great night. My roomie met us there and I knew straight away we were going to get on just fine.

Day 4

An early rise allowed us to be on the road early with the destination of Halong Bay a four hour bus trip away.
I spent time getting to know my new Swiss friend and watching the sites that we drove by.

We got to the dock and set sail on a boat that was meant for royalty. A twin share cabin with its own bathroom was only the start of a wonderful day. We had lunch, at least 10 courses then sailed through the keystone islands that were just majestic. I literally thought I was on the set of the pirates of the carribean. The mist and low sun gave the ocean a perfect ambience. We took a charter to a nearby island were we climed 400 steep stairs. A true achievement for me and admired the views from above. After desending we swum in the freezing cold water then headed back for a boat party!
Drinks and dinner was served a mere 12 courses including crab snapper prawns beef chicken everything really. We watched the sun set and partyed under the stars until bed called us.

Day 5

Breakfast was served at 7 and then we had time to kayak around the islands before taking part in a spring roll making class. After lunch we said goodbye to new friends and headed back to Hanoi.

We meet up with the rest of the group and had dinner at a local place before heading out to beer street once again. The night was young so we decided to head to a club and danced our socks off until it closed.

Day 6
Leaving Vietnam we took a flight to Vientiane in Laos and were rather excited about the water festival that was taking place. It is a celebration of their New year the start of the monsoon season. We didnt really know what to expect other than we were going to get wet. And wet we did get. Exporing the new country we were doused with water on every corner. Buckets, cups hoses water pistols you name it. We were handed beer and went into party mode straight away. The night was spent dancing under sprinklers and laughing alot.

Day 7

Making our way to Vang Viang we had a choice to take a bicycle to the blue lagoon. I choose a pretty pink bike and was surprised that I took to it quite easily even though i hadnt ridden in years. The streets were busy with cars tuk tuks and trucks and I began to feel anxious that I wouldnt be able to make the 7 k journey. A few ks in I began to panic and decided I wouldnt carry on. I was overhearting and decided to turn back, my roomie came with me and we enjoyed the air con until everyone came back. After a rest we went to dinner and partied once again ending the night with a street pancake covered in banana and nutella. Yumo

Day 8

Against our tour leaders advise and our insurance for that matter a few of us went tubing down the river. It was epic. Stopping at bars along the way drinking slushies and red bull we basked in the sun and played in the water fights. Tubing in Laos is a must and made for a great day.
That night we went out for dinner where a single lady took our orders and cooked for the whole group it was absolutely delicious. I downed a litre of water as I had forgotten to drink during the day. Too little to late though as my plate was cleared I felt a dizzy spell coming on. The next thing I know everyone is yelling my name and I slumped down on the table. I was unable to move and heard people saying my lips were blue. I was hardly conscious and could not respond but was able to follow the deep breathing of my roomie guiding me. Next thing I know Im being lifted into a tuk tuk and being rushed to hospital. I came around as I was lifted onto the gurney and thought to my self what kind of hell is this. If this was a hospital then fuck me. It was rubbish. They wouldnt do anything until money was handed over. I was given a shot of god nos what and then made to drink saline. My entire stomach came up and they basically discharged me. Shakily I was lead into a tuk tuk and driven home. I would like to shoutout to my tour leader my roomie my swiss friend and all those who helped me without you Im not sure what I would have done. As soon as I got into bed I rung christopher and mum and reassured them that I was ok.

Day 9

After a fitfull sleep I decided I was ok to travel so we took a private mini bus to Luang Prabang. We went out for lunch and rested most of the day having dinner in a jungle themed restaurant. We ended the night at the world famous Utopia laying on a bamboo deck meters above the canopy. It was heaven.
The next morning the delhi belly started and did not stop. I spent more time in the bathroom then I did in bed. I was plauged with sickness and sadness as my roomie decided that she needed to get back to the states to seek medical attention. I was feeling really sorry for myself and run a bath and just lay there crying. I was not in a good way and the tour leader suggested I take a volunterry leave as the next two days consisted of 20 hours travel by boat along the Mekong.
I thought long and hard about it and decided to go with his advise and fly to Chaing Mai where I would meet up with the group in two days. That night I sleep fitfully scared of flying by myslef to a new town.

Day 10

Feeling a lot better I boarded a short but turbulent flight to thailand and as soon as I set foot in the hotel I knew I had made the right decision. I spent the day by the pool getting a pedicure and relaxing.

And so the story continues…..

Jun 23

Food for Thought

A psychologist walked around a room while teaching stress management to an audience. As she raised a glass of water, everyone expected they’d be asked the “half empty or half full” question. Instead, with a smile on her face, she inquired: “How heavy is this glass of water?”

Answers called out ranged from 8 oz. to 20 oz.

She replied, “The absolute weight doesn’t matter. It depends on how long I hold it. If I hold it for a minute, it’s not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I’ll have an ache in my arm. If I hold it for a day, my arm will feel numb and paralyzed. In each case, the weight of the glass doesn’t change, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.”

She continued, “The stresses and worries in life are like that glass of water. Think about them for a while and nothing happens. Think about them a bit longer and they begin to hurt. And if you think about them all day long, you will feel paralyzed – incapable of doing anything.”

Remember to put the glass down.

(Courtesy of Jimmy Harmon)

Jun 23

It couldn’t get any beter

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Blessings are truley wonderful and I’m feeling so grateful right now. I feel like I’ve come to a point in my life where I am truley happy. I have God, I have a loving caring and supportive partner and I have a family that love me.
I’m so thankful for where I am today.

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My anxiety levels are down, I no longer fear for my future but instead am excited and ready.

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God has a plan for me, I have faith that together we can live free and I believe that the best is yet to come.

Peace Sammi